i’m happy to say that it is been five years since I’ve drink alcohol! It is been a very hard five years to not consume the very drink that used to make me feel better about myself. This was the one drink that I could turn to on a very bad day that would make me feel better about myself better about my life and it would lie to me and tell me that I needed it! It’s not easy to not drink. You have to have a firm ground that you stand on and believing for the reason you weren’t drinking anymore. Because if you don’t have any foundation for your reason for not drinking it’ll be so easy to falter and will be so easy for others to talk you into taking a drink.
There’s nothing that gets me more frustrated than with someone who finds out that I don’t drink and I say some part that it does have to do with my faith they tell me “Well, Jesus made water into wine so he don’t mind” or “they drank wine in the Bible so it’s ok”. You don’t need to tell me whatever excuse it is that you use to drink alcohol to feel better about it. The truth is if you’re trying to justify it by finding reasons in the Bible for you to drink it then you feel guilty for drinking it because your conscience is telling you that it’s wrong. But that’s a whole other argument for another day. My problem is is I don’t understand how people are so uncompassionate this day that they can try to find a way to justify for me to drink when I said I gave it up. Do you think it’s easy not to drink alcohol? Do you even know what it’s like for someone who used to drink it all the time, to have to struggle with not drinking it? Or when she works at a place that serves it and she has to smell it and the smell is good to her and she can’t drink it, do you know how hard that is?!?
I don’t drink it because I am better without it. I don’t drink it because I want to bring glory to God, and there’s no part of me that brings glory to him when consuming it. I don’t drink it because the sinful part of me takes over and I can’t control myself when I drink it. I don’t drink it because I have mistakes that will haunt me forever for the choices I made while drinking it. I don’t drink it because I’m trying to be a good role model for my children, I don’t want them to have to suffer what I suffered because I couldn’t control not drinking it. I don’t drink it because I’ve seen what alcohol has done to my family multiple times, and I don’t want that for my family! I don’t drink it because I am better without it. I don’t drink it because I am happy. And I don’t drink it anymore because that void I had, has been filled by Jesus Christ! I don’t drink it because I have an amazing husband who loves me despite my past. I don’t drink it because I have been blessed with beautiful children. I don’t drink it because this is my second chance. I will not bring any shame purposely into my life.
Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, (Ephesians 5:18 NIV)
And just because I don’t drink it, doesn’t mean I don’t want to drink it.
Almost every day is a struggle with a craving for it. With the craving of wanting to escape the hardships of life with it. Every day is a thought of what does that beer taste like or I wonder if that drink taste good? But I have to fight that curiosity. I was a beer girl. A big time beer drinker, I loved the smell of it. And even smelling it now or watching commercials I can feel a part of me fighting the curiousity out of my head. It’s not easy.
Proverbs describes it best:::
Who has woe? Who has sorrow? Who has strife? Who has complaints? Who has needless bruises? Who has bloodshot eyes? Those who linger over wine, who go to sample bowls of mixed wine. Do not gaze at wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it goes down smoothly! In the end it bites like a snake and poisons like a viper. Your eyes will see strange sights, and your mind will imagine confusing things. You will be like one sleeping on the high seas, lying on top of the rigging. “They hit me,” you will say, “but I’m not hurt! They beat me, but I don’t feel it! When will I wake up so I can find another drink?” (Proverbs 23:29-35 NIV)
Whoever says doing good is lying. It is hard. Especially when you grow up without walking in God, you don’t think about this stuff. Everyday is a struggle to make sure your walk with God is strong. And that others can see you are different because of the Holy Spirit. Walking right is not easy. But God never promises an easy walk for us.
So don’t tell me all these reasons it’s ok to drink. It’s my choice and my walk. Don’t make the temptation ever harder for me. The temptation is there daily and I don’t need someone trying put more on me. You drink if you honestly believe it’s ok.
We are here to bring glory to Him. If you think by drinking alcohol you’re bringing glory, than that’s between you and God. Just don’t bring me into your sin to justify your actions.
Wine is a mocker and beer a brawler; whoever is led astray by them is not wise. (Proverbs 20:1 NIV)